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PC Brigade Launches Offensive On Offensive, Racist Burritos

Illegal Pete’s is a small restaurant chain in Colorado that by most online reviews, makes some dynamite tex-mex. Think Chipotle, only small, local, and with a bar. In a few weeks they’ll be opening a new restaurant in the Colorado town of Fort Collins. And it is there that owner Pete Turner is now entering the crosshairs of the Thought Police.

Apparently having a restaurant that serves burritos while having the word illegal in its name is name is the height of insensitivity. He might as well open a restaurant called N-word’s Fried Chicken. Owner Pete Turner sat down with Fort Collins residents as they expressed concern and dismay for his blatant disregard for the sensitivities of any and all civilized social progressives, their undocumented laborers or the dependent families who might happen to walk by and see the sign on his restaurant. Pete maintained to them that the name was in reference to a bar from a novel he read.

In an epic display of irony/ignorance/dishonesty one person in attendance, Lucy Gonzales, stated, “Since I know the context, and I have been labeled with (the word illegal), it makes a huge difference to me.”

She either does not understand the meaning of the word context, paid absolutely no attention to Turner when he explained the backstory of the name, or simply came with an axe to grind. People at the meeting actually avoided saying illegal, saying the “I” word instead. (insert face into palm and weep for the future of the human race) These people could have been busy curing a disease, harnessing cold fusion or at the very least opening their own vegan restaurant in response: Undocumented Transgendered Patricia’s.

For an hour people relayed to him anecdotes about how somewhere, sometime someone was mean to them, they’re still upset about it, and the mere utterance of Illegal Pete’s causes their PTSD to kick in. Towards the end the moderator for the meeting, Kim Medina, asked him to change the name to Pete’s Mexican Restaurant. He replied that he had a lot to consider. The fact that he didn’t tell the room to get bent whilst pulling out his phone and informing them that he was placing a call to ICE to report the whereabouts of several illegal immigrants, not that they’d actually do anything about it, makes me disinclined to ever patronize Illegal Pete’s on my next trip back to Colorado. Shame, they sounded good.

This is harassment, counter to the very spirit of the First Amendment. To take up such an asinine banner might leave your ability to handle adult life in question, but it leaves no doubt for where your loyalties lie. At the end Medina stated plans to “mobilize”, either for celebration or protest. Seriously? This is a guy trying to sell burritos. If this is what leads you to activism, you suck. Your life sucks and you don’t deserve to have any friends.

Everyone, stop letting these useful idiots have their way. They may be slightly amusing and more than a little irritating, but they’re also dangerous. They’re working as obnoxious, petty wranglers for their elitist handlers seeking to make views opposing their own agenda illegal.

About John Sutton

Married father of three. 5 C's. Particularly concerned with matters pertaining to the 1st, 2nd, 4th, and 10th Amendments.

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